i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
do nipples grow back?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
