ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
time to smoke my breakfast
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize