matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
