I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
