Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
