walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize