I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
