Buhtt sex?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize
