I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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