he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
is that a dick in a sweater?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
