No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
