We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize
