Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
