Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
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