I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Randomize
