i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
