Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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