I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
