And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
