exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
