There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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