I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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