is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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