addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
should my penis look like a turkey
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
