So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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