did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
