he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I just googled if crying burns calories
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize