Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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