But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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