This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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