I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
