Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize