White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize