maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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