You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Your cock deserves a montage
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
