She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
