so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
