we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize