Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
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