Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
