Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
