oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
