I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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