I wanna bring you to show and tell
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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