we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
