just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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