so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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