Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
