I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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