The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
wow bdsm is so cute
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize